I don't want anyone to get the idea that I spend every lonely night tucked up in the corner of a bar, but I do spend the occasional night out on my own. Although a bit daunting, going out on my own lets me get a better sense of my surroundings and really explore places without any worries. I don't question if I am being a good host to whoever has decided to tag along one one of my little adventures, and the night revolves around me.
Bars may not be the best place to meet your future husband/wife, or even ideal for an intellectual conversation, but it is amazing who you can meet in the right place at the right time. Sometimes those people just don't come and chat to you, or even walk into the bar that night. On those nights, I am left with the bartender.
Oh bartender, whether you be young, old, foreign, male, female, sweet, flirty, or just busy as hell, you are the heart pumping alcohol into everyone's glasses. You are the friend I sometimes need when I sit down on those stools which line up along the counter. Really, bartenders can be the main draw on whether or not to return to a bar for me. Someone who takes the time to tell me what's in a crazy drink or even plays darts with the customers makes me feel open and welcome. Someone is taking care of me! Sure, they're paid to do it, but what do I care?
Whether the place I rest my glass be torn and battered or sleek and trendy, sitting at the bar is like having front and center seats for a favorite concert. It's in the center of the action. People walking into the bar for the first time during the night will pass by, allowing you to check them out subtly. The hustle and bustle of a busy night will surround you as people press in on either side, hoping to grab the bartender's attention. Especially because people watching and eavesdropping are more than appealing to my curious nature, it's hard not to enjoy the night. Even quieter nights allow for a bit of one on one time with a sweet bartender, assuming it's a friendly bar and they want you to come back.
I never really found it strange to go out to bars by myself. I think maybe in the back of my mind I hold onto the slightly dark, yet idyllic image of cowboys in a new town, or perhaps just being the woman at the end of the bar. The woman at the end of the bar... where did I even get that image?
I feel like I should be able to find a photo of Audrey Hepburn or Constance Bennett in a dress holding a cocktail, just... having a break from her current adventure. I feel like it wouldn't matter if she were just waiting for an old friend or exploring a new city where her film was being shot. She would be at ease, her legs politely crossed, but leaning back in her chair, giving off a sense of openness. Perhaps she would be standing at the bar, politely leaning in to order her next drink from the bartender, or just commenting on what a lovely time she was having in the area.
Maybe my imagination is just trying to comfort me into believing that a young lady can go out on her own and still be considered respectable. I can't think of many friends who venture off on their own at night to check out the bar down the road. I suppose I am usually pressured by utter boredom or am forced by disinterested friends to take the lead and do what I want to do. Hell, maybe it's my pride which is telling me that going to bars alone isn't strange AND that it's beneficial.
Alcohol is supposed the smooth the awkward silences, and loosen one's lips. It's a lovely place to go when there is nothing else better to do. I am also a fan of visiting the cinema by myself, taking strolls through the park, wandering around libraries, aimlessly window shopping, and exploring famous sites by myself before ever dragging someone else into a potentially uncomfortable situation which neither of us foresaw as we were too shy to previously do a test run.
So, test run your bars. Test run your trips. Be a good host?
